Banish Bad Thoughts

Do you worry that you don't measure up to the achievements of others? Perhaps you think your sister has a better job than you, or you feel your best friend has the perfect relationship and family. Perhaps you often wonder how you'll ever be as good as other people. While a degree of self reflection is healthy, a constant fear of not being good enough can be emotionally debilitating. In fact, it's most often not other people who cause you to question your decisions; it's much more likely that you are your own worst critic.

Banishing bad thoughts is about silencing the little voice in your head that is always telling you: 'you can't; you're not as good as them; it won't work; don't bother trying'. The voice is part of you; it's the part of you that is fearful. Stopping this negative self talk is essential to being able to realise your dreams because if you think there's no point beginning to work towards your goals because you 'can't' then, of course, you'll never achieve what you want!

But it's not just your emotional health that benefits from silencing that niggling voice of self criticism. Banishing bad thoughts and focusing on the positives has a very real effect on your physical health, too. A study from Illinois University found that people with a positive outlook lived longer than those who described themselves as pessimists. Positive thinking has also been found to lower your stress levels and to boost your immune system.

How to think positive

Use these tips as a starting point to begin to change your perspective on issues in your life so you can banish those bad thoughts forever and replace them with positive thinking.

Positive thoughts on love & relationships:

• Even in tough times, there is love around you. Don't cut yourself off from other people, instead open up and you'll find plenty of people who want to help you.
• If you act in a loving way, you will attract love back to you.
• You cannot control the way somebody else behaves. But you can control how you react to them.
• You must learn to love and accept yourself before you can expect to find somebody else to love you.
• A new potential partner will notice the value you place upon yourself and treat you accordingly. Respect yourself.
• Communication is key. Talk to your partner about what you want and expect from them. Don't expect them to be able to read your mind!
• Instead of thinking 'I will never find love' - believe that it will come to you at just the right moment.

Positive thoughts on your career:

• What seems like a disaster at the time can turn out to be the best thing that has ever happened to you.
• So long as you put the effort in, something better is just around the corner.
• Think 'I can' not 'I can't' and the best possible outcome will occur.
• Let go of your pre-conceived expectations. Go with the flow.
• Everyone makes mistakes. It's what you learn from them that matters.
  
  

Positive thoughts on self confidence:

• Be grateful for the things you have rather than those you lack.
• Tell yourself you are worthy, you are confident and you are deserving of happiness. Believe it!
• If your confidence is low, think about a time when somebody complimented you.
• Think of a person who you know values you. What exactly do they admire about you?
• True wealth is your talent and resourcefulness. It is found in the people who love you and in those you love.

Positive thoughts on family and friends

• Don’t bear ill will towards friends you feel have wronged you. Let go of the negativity and you will be happier.
• If you are lonely, be brave and try a local group (book club, history group, crafts group, sports club). You'll meet new people.
• If someone or something is upsetting you, take back your personal power by seeing the situation in a different way.
• Think before you act or speak. But then have the courage of your convictions.